April is Autism Awareness month.
Autism is a general term used to describe a group of complex developmental brain disorders known as Pervasive Developmental Disorders (PDD). The other pervasive developmental disorders are PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder – Not
Otherwise Specified), Asperger's Syndrome, Rett Syndrome and Childhood Disintegrative Disorder. Many parents and professionals refer to this group as Autism Spectrum Disorders. Autism Speaks
Parenting Autism
In 2006 my son Brian was diagnosed with PDD, he was 3 at the time. Initially, I thought that the doctor was insane. I thought that his behaviors where a little abnormal but not to the extent of a disorder such as Autism. I decided to get a second opinion and a third and even a fourth and fifth. I was shocked and saddened by the diagnosis. Denial consumed me. I was convinced that there was nothing wrong with Brian and that he would grow out of it, of course that didn't happen. My thoughts of Autism then were the worst, basically because I was uneducated to the disorder. My emotions were extreme because in my eyes his life would never be close to that of a normal person. What was I going to do?
The first major step in helping my son was to accept the diagnosis. That may have been the most emotional period for me. Like I said, Brian seemed somewhat normal. I took him to the doctors because his speech was delayed. I never thought I would be walking out the doctor doors with a tears in my eyes. I could not grasp this in my mind and denial set in my thoughts. This denial delayed the support I would later receive for an entire year. Overcoming this, required support from my family and friends, and yes five different opinions from five different doctors. I didn't realize I was stalling progress with my nonacceptance of the diagnosis. I don't regret taking Brian for different opinions, in fact I recommend it, but when I look back now, I see how my own feelings interfered with the professional support and recommendations. So, for all you Mom's that may travel down this road, "Step 1" in getting your child support is to "Accept the Diagnosis" in your mind.
Educating myself was naturally the next direction I would take. I began to spend hours beyond hours scouring the internet for details. I thought I could read some doctors thoughts and easily get an explanation of the disorder, so I could start helping Brian. "Easy" could not have been further from the truth. I quickly learned that symptoms varied, explanations were a fallacy, and no two doctors thoughts were the same. My heart desired to know the cause, for self blame consumed my nightmares. A cause was another plethora of maybes and unproven ideas. A yearning for all the answers would easily result in 6-8 hours a day on the internet. This began another obstacle I had to mentally overcome. I had to accept that all the answers were not just going to be handed to me. In fact, I later learned that all the answers just don't exist, yet. Instead of concrete answers I then turned to other parents for lesson's learned and familiarity. I also just wanted to hear that I wasn't alone in this process. That's when i found www.cafemom.com . I engaged in heart-filled conversations and learned many practices that I would later involve in Brian's daily routine. I started to see a little light at the end of the tunnel, because normalcy was never a thought until I spoke to other Mom's. "Find a Support Channel" would be the next step in helping your family and yourself. Whether it be the internet or actual support meetings, find the avenue the best suites you, to help share your emotions and learn more about Autism first hand.
I hope some Moms can relate to my situation, I will continue to share my lessons learned and the further steps of my family's ongoing journey, throughout Autism Awareness Month.
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